Baywatch: Hawaiian Wedding - worst revenge plan ever

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Stinker Madness - The Bad Movie Podcast

TV & Film


An old villain from Mitch's past comes back to enact revenge by.... having him get married to his one true love? With a cast of Baywatchers this size, and a plot as dumb as it is, this has got to be one wild ride, right? Well.... Sato (Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa) comes back from season 2 of the Baywatch TV series, to get revenge against Mitch and Hobie for getting him arrested. That's all fine and good. The issue lies in how he decides to get it. He gets his girlfriend to have Face-Off style surgery to look just like former show member and off/on again Mitch love interest, Stephanie Holden. Then she must seduce Mitch, bone-down with him repeatedly, get him to propose and then get him to agree to have the wedding on a volcano island so that Sato can put his friends in James Bond style death traps and let Mitch save them. Lots of moving parts in this diabolical-ness. While Baywatch: Hawaiian Wedding is VERY Baywatchesque - it's just too much like a 2 hour TV Episode and not enough like a movie. Yes it has the tone and pace of an episode from the height and stinker quality of the peak of Baywatch. Yes it's the greatest cast in the history of the show. Yes its a great close to the show after the horrendously uninteresting Baywatch Hawaii. But this is a major missed opportunity for the team. We needed a lot more "movie" in it. Car chases, stuntmen on fire, exploding choppers, various stink-eyes given and much more karate fights. Even if they'd gone with just generic film tropes and did nothing imaginative here, Baywatch: Hawaiian Wedding could have gone down as a cult classic. But what it is can only really appeal to people who love the show and at this point, those people are few and far between. It's a sad way to end.