Warm mug of phantom poetry episode 9: being in love,

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Warm Mug of Phantom Poetry

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Catching feelings- He told me he loved me last night I wanted to ask how I wanted to ask why I wanted him to explain it as if I was a math equation and love was the answer to solving me fixing me but it's not I'm sorry I don't even say I'm sorry anymore I just shut up quiet down No one will hear me leave Because I wont dare make a sound I don't like talking about myself Except in poetry, somehow it feels more filtered there like not the ugly coffee grounds I have wont make it into your coffee in the morning Maybe he doesn't love me he just loves the idea of me I'm afraid I don't even say I am afraid these days My mouth shivers with anxiety and no one ever gets that close to me but he's getting close to me, falling in love with me or so he says I'm paranoid scared he'll find the real me behind every carefully placed brick of this wall, scared he'll not like what he sees or worse, scared he'll actually love me and I hate me, I don't tell him this but I do believe he knows this I don't know how anyone could love someone who won't even bother liking themselves. I think I am ugly Except when he calls me pretty I feel like crying in his arms honestly Am I really allowed to have the answer this time? Maybe I'm not meant to be solved I'm not some project after all. Maybe I am not afraid or sorry that he loves me Maybe I'm just scared to love me. January 12 2019 Kiss me Kiss me with your smile Ask me to stay awhile Kiss me in the moonlight Tell me it's alright Kiss me with one hand on my waist the other on my butt Kiss me because you don't give a fuck Kiss me with your words Kiss me because it means everything Kiss me because you want to Kiss me like you knew it was right Kiss me like your life depends on it Kiss me like tomorrow won't come Kiss me because maybe we'll have another day to kiss again Kiss me sloppily Kiss me with those wet soft lips I've always wanted to taste Kiss me as were laughing Kiss me while we're crying Kiss me before we sleep Kiss me as we are waking up Kiss me in the rain Kiss me in the sunshine Kiss me no matter the weather Kiss me cause you like to kiss me I'd like to kiss you, I'd like to know what your lips on mine feel like I wanna kiss you no matter the weather Kiss you in the rain Kiss you in the snow Kiss you and not let go Kiss you as you fall asleep Kiss you as your eyes return to open Kiss you in the middle of the song while you're singing Kiss you as you begin to giggle Kiss you to know what it's like to kiss you Kiss you when you need comfort Kiss you when you need quiet Kiss you because we might not get another day Kiss you because we still have tomorrow Kiss you even if some say it's wrong Kiss you feircely Kiss you and have it not mean anything I'll kiss you because I want to because I need to I kiss you for awhile Till we're both left with smiles Kissing you in the sun light Kiss me and it feels right Kiss me and I'll kiss you. Falling in love on the foot path I wanna lay in the grass As you exhale the breeze Your breathe against my neck is calming to me Can I get lost in your scent? The way birds lose track of flying when they sing their song. Will you hold me safely but not too closely just enough but still with space to grow Just enough to know someone needs me Will you try not to forget me the way we forget the sun when it rains Can we wash the tears down the drain I wanna fall asleep next to you, eyes met, no regret with nothing to do Am I worthy of table for two Of the love you give so sweetly Can we just be here existing, maybe kissing, are you listening to the way I'm learning to be okay Do you care, because I'm oh so aware, that if I dare, be honest and open I might scare you away. I feel exhausting from the changing sensations, the spikes in tempature, leaves falling becoming snow, I just hope you won't get sick of me Don't let go Love is natural I've been told it comes from within But do the fish ever forget how to swim? Can I like being in my skin I'm trying to want --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app