I fucked up. I accidentally turned off the recording for Brandon and Jennifer for about 10 minutes toward the end while Brandon was still reading. To make up for it I spliced in their mics from another episode to compliment my bare recording of myself and also threw in some audio of me taking a lovely little walk through New Brunswick this past Mother's Day.

Undressing Underground Podcast

WAPIAR - E17 - SORRY

WAPIAR - E16 - Impossible Dog

Probably the most pointlessly avant garde episode yet. We talk about Afghanistan, then Jennifer recites the entire episode while Brandon plays music and I breathe and try to communicate with him over her, then we talk about Bukowski.

WAPIAR - E15 - Bullshit, mostly

WAPIAR - E14 - FUCK

We raced each other to see who could read our own parts first. Mostly we talked about cancel culture and capitalism. Brandon's got a cool mic. I talk over Jennifer a lot but try to give her room to speak.

WAPIAR - E13 - Rat Race

I was hospitalized and am still sick, so that's why this is late. Sorry to the recurring 5 listeners.

WAPIAR - E12 - Speaking of William S Burroughs...

I've got nothing else to say. You know more or less what this show is now if you've heard any other episode.

WAPIAR - E11 - William S Burroughs

The gang reads a bunch of words off a page.

WAPIAR - E10 - Irreversible

Hey, we're back! This time I'm Jennifer, Jennifer's Brandon, and Brandon's me! Hoorah! Apparently most people that listen to this don't realize that it's the same episode every time. So, yes, this is our 8th time reading the transcription I wrote of the first episode, which was not scripted. Enjoy. Or don't. We talk about some other stuff too. Still not sure where this is going, but it's going there. All the way. Baby. Driver. Let's have a panic attack together.

WAPIAR - E9 - Leon's Getting Larger

Sorry for the delay, I've been busy. We may just do two weeks from today now. I dunno. This episode Jennifer is Rob, Brandon is Jennifer, and Rob is Brandon. Next week, more inanity. I meant to do a Peter & the Wolf intro, because all podcasts are obligated to do that at least once, but I didn't. Sorry. 

WAPIAR - E8 - I had to rearrange their faces and give them all another name

I dunno I'm still high. We all got high. Went about as you'd expect. Also listened to a lot allegedly royalty free future funk that's present through most of this so sue the YouTube, not me. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WVOH00wVFbc&t=3035s if you wanna check it out without us. It's very upbeat and nice. There was a song sorta like that on the new of Montreal album. I know it's not cool to like of Montreal anymore I guess? Or is it? Every time I go to their shows I feel like an adult chaperone for all the teenagers running around in fancy colors while I'm just there in my button up shirt and cardigan. Let's go see of Montreal when the pandemic's over guys, yeah? I threw up again in this episode. Brandon fell asleep I think. Jennifer has a revelation. verything about Joey was ideal in what one might want in a secondary partner. He, too, was a dad with a spouse and a full-time job. He enjoyed hipster cuisine as much as I did, making delicious food with vegetables from his garden, and finding hole-in-the-wall restaurants all over town that served up the sort of meals you’d be proud to smugly post about on Instagram. In the bedroom he was fun and experimental, but not overly so, for my tastes. On dates, he treated me like a normal human being -- we were both polyamorous people with family, not fetishized experiments waiting to be easily pursued and captured by excitable single people or ravenous swingers. Joey was warm, with big blue eyes, jet-black hair, and soft, pale skin. He was tall, and lanky: completely non-threatening, kind and gentle from his personality turning outward onto his appearance. His wife, Sara, was quiet but polite, with auburn hair and dark freckles across a tan face. Their six-month-old baby girl was a perfect blend of both, with freckles and tufts of black hair. The tinges of jealousy soon began to creep in, however. The assumption that people who are polyamorous have conquered envy is rather incorrect, but even so, this was not a romantic jealousy that I was experiencing. I was envious of their house, their massive wine cellar, their house full of archaeological wonders and authentic mementos from a world they had extensively traveled. I was envious of their upper-middle-class home, jobs, their horseback riding and golfing hobbies, and sporadic trips to international resorts. I was envious of their log cabin two hours away in the mountains -- and when they decided to move out there permanently, I was happy to use it as an opportunity to end the relationship. It’d only been casual anyway, right? A year later, Sara was dead: a rare, fast-spreading breast cancer. I felt crushed for her baby and for Joey, and my envy turned into the sort of guilt that has no place to go except the inside of your stomach in sharp twists and nauseated regret. My husband, Samuel, and I attended the funeral in a sad room of marble-velvet-embroidery furniture, which was crowded with respectable, mournful people who all seemed equally shocked to be there. Joey moved away from the mourners giving out their sorry-for-your-losses, walking toward me with a curious stride. We embraced awkwardly, but deeply, and I also told him I was sorry for his loss, because what else is there to say? “Hey,” he said. “Thanks for coming,” he leaned in closer. A line of people waited behind me at their chance for the performative apology, knowing there’s not a single word they can actually say to take away the fact that the person in front of them had just lost the mother of his sweet baby girl, who would likely be unable to remember her at all. “I hope we can talk later…” he said, trailing off, distracted by the crowds of meaningless well-wishers. I leaned in to hug him and told him: “Contact me any time. If there’s anything, anything, I could do… Please let me know.” I meant it. READ THE REST https://www.olneymagazine.com/features/dead-black-lingerie

WAPIAR - Episode 7 or 8 - CANCELLED

By far the most belligerent (and thus longest) attempt yet. I still feel like crap from how much I drank. Some of Jennifer's lines take new meaning this week. Stay tuned for more of the same in two weeks. READ Jennifer's new story, DEAD BLACK LINGERIE over at Olney Magazine in the link below. https://www.olneymagazine.com/features/dead-black-lingerie

WAPIAR - E6 - The One Where the Gang Gets Drunk and Forgets How to Read

It's lent. We're bored and sober. Brandon performs mukbang. If there's no links here, it's because I didn't come back to add them after making dinner. Look at the old episodes for links. It's Bandcamp Friday this week, so buy Brandon and my stuff.

WAPIAR - E5 - Lent

Oh boy, oh geez. Rob smokes 3 different kinds of weed in the first 10 minutes (he's a light weight as is), Brandon attempts to drink every time one of us says "like" and then proceeds to get very hammered fast, and Jennifer has a game running on her phone or something that fucks up her internet for most of the episode. Also people interrupt Brandon and Jennifer but we roll on. Good stuff. Everything unravels further. READ Jennifer: http://dirtbagchristian.substack.com LISTEN to Brandon: http://dresserdrawers.bandcamp.com WATCH Rob: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oIBaTpyTldc

WAPIAR - E4 - FUCK

Brandon and Rob begin disassociating and Jennifer keeps the whole thing moving. READ Jennifer: https://dirtbagchristian.substack.com LISTEN to Brandon: https://dresserdrawer.bandcamp.com/releases WALK with Rob: https://open.spotify.com/show/6ZYfl0N7xwsY3ZT9v0XITp