007: My Inside-Out Beauty


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Eric Barry Writes: Poetry, Short Stories, and Writing


My Inside-Out Beauty What role of disgust must I fulfill In order to fill the hole that I feel In order to feel whole and feel real An order of happiness found in a pill Is it "Fuck! Shit! Mother of God!" "I am made ugly! Parade the facade!" Is it bubbling, boiling, oozing with fat? "Acne on my face! Moles on my back!" What will be demanded of me To proclaim imperfection and help me to see That I once was blind to the ugly in me Some exercise in catharsis to purge this beauty An exercise in fingers and bile and throats An exercise to see what misery company loves most An exercise in “Ready? One two three lift!” An exorcism of esteem, an osmosis of shit Hairy nipples, hairy ass, hairy balls, hairy legs Hair he dreads, hair he snips, hair he clips, but his head Butt his head ram his head in disgust to the wall Butt his head ram in it, to makeup what’s too small To makeup for what was once clear, Too makeup to makeup for labels and queers Let’s makeup and take-up our worries and fears And fill in the gaps with made-up real tears I made up and stayed up and ate up and prayed up Potato, Alfredo, I made my own weight up In the end I could send a whole list of self-loathing Perfected projections of imperfections disclosing "I hereby decree," I decided to sing Fuck it, my voice is another terrible thing Forced into dwelling and showing and telling Verbally sprinting while emotions keep swelling Why pry open lids to the rotten in me? Blood skin and bones is all I can be Live by truth, live through fear, live with hope, live in time Live bisexual, live contextual, live it all, live it live From head to toe, thrive in your skin From ugliness to beauty, live beginning to end. From the beginning no focus, out of focus, can’t focus The negative tricks and the body image broke us The negative tricks and the hocus and pocus The folks were confused, their feelings made bogus In the end, live by truth, live sincere, live in time Live bisexual, live contextual, live it all, live it live From head to toe, thrive in your skin My inside-out beauty, live beginning to end -- Social Links:  instagram.com/ericbarrywrites twitter.com/ericbarry facebook.com/ericbarrywrites email: ericbarrywrites@gmail.com