Miscellaneous
On his way through the Amazon, seven days from even the tiniest village, John ends up getting shipwrecked, circled by a hungry jaguar, harpooning monkeys for dinner, dicing with piranhas, sipping hallucinogenic drugs from a cauldron and encountering a six foot goldfish wearing a hat and sunglasses (this was, unsurprisingly, as a direct result of imbibing what was in the cauldron). John’s stories of the Amazon are legendary and he’s managed to persuade the BBC, who are apparently reluctant to let him die on their watch, to let him return to the Amazon very soon. Yikes. On this episode we cover: What John was doing in the Amazon in the first place In 1992 being very close to getting some kind of international agreements to stop global warming Because of the US that ceased to exist Travelling through the farthest reaches of the westernmost amazon 7 days traveling down the Envira river Harpooning a monkey for dinner Eating monkeys, snakes and caimans What monkey tastes like Hard to eat something like looks like a roasted baby (!) Being ‘burned to buggery’ A sinking boat Things that bite and chew and electrocute Shipwrecked in the middle of nowhere Being circled by a hungry jaguar Being 7 days travel from the nearest tiny settlement Being the first white man seen by the tribe Swapping mirrors and beads with the Ashaninka John necking hallucinogenic drugs from a cauldron A taste ‘worse than bat urine’ Making friends with a six foot goldfish in a hat Is John really returning to the Amazon to bring back the really good drugs…? Going back - is everyone going to be in Manchester United shirts The forest is now under real threat Struggling to get the BBC to agree to his return The BBC worrying he’ll ‘hand in his lunch pail’ (aka die) on the way The BBC being worried that if John dies the Daily Mail will have a field day Growing a beard especially for the trip The problem of seaweed in Mexico and parts of the Caribbean John will still be going on a small boa, up the same river and facing the same dangers John being up for absolutely anything Is there anything John wouldn’t do…? (note he wouldn’t kill anyone but he does have a story about how he once came close to it in Afghanistan)