Miscellaneous
John is another one of my favorite people. I met him when I needed to lose 40 pounds, but he cares deeply about how your frame of mind influences your physical body. Hint: it’s a huge influence. He has the patience of a monk, and the uncanny ability to push you beyond your limits without being a drillmaster. His no B.S. approach and his patience and caring have always resonated with me. I guess that’s what a dual degree in Exercise Science and Psychology will get you! The process of mental change to affect the physical was all the reason I needed to share his thoughts with you. A few years ago, John created The Creator’s Course. It is a 12-week program to help you get in better shape. Reading his materials “The Fundamentals” I knew this was different. I had always been overweight. Maybe a total of 4 years of my life I’ve been “thin.” There was a lot of emotional shit to go through in order to even think that I, yes this guy right here, even belonged near an ‘athletic’ facility. That’s when this hit me: Guilt is a useful emotion. For example, if you are an ass to your spouse, and you feel bad about it, that’s a good feeling. Guilt says, we did something that needs to change or be corrected. It tells us to change our behaviors. Shame is never, NEVER useful. If you eat a container of ice cream, do you feel like you’re an awful person? “I’m a fat fuck. No wonder why I can’t lose weight.” And you don’t speak about it with anyone, because you’re too ashamed to. That’s shame. That’s no longer guilt. Hiding your fears won’t change an action, even if you hate yourself for it. Only by bringing it into the light can you start to take constructive changes that are worthwhile for you. I was blown away. I had never known how much shame I carried, even though I didn’t want to admit it to myself. I’ve learned a lot since those days, but the decades that I’ve spent with the negative emotions linked to shame….well I knew John was different. I had anger too. He wrote: And all that anger and hate, it made me some progress, but not nearly as much as when I started to accept my past. When I could accept my anger and my hate was when I could see that that wasn’t — and isn’t — me. I like smiling and having fun a lot more. That’s my shit. But I couldn’t hate or anger my way towards self-acceptance. That took a completely different beast and one that has been infinitely harder to do. Anger is easy. It’s energizing. It gives me the energy to start a change. But it definitely doesn’t give me the energy to finish the change. Eventually I get worn down I had never heard anyone talking about these kinds of issues in approaching physical transformation. Sure, psychologists talk about it. Trainers talk about weights, reps and sets. I knew I’d finally found someone who understood a framework of the limits and thoughts within my head AND how to create physical and mental changes. This is the same for anything. I respect John’s process immensely. John has been helping men and women lose fat, lose weight, tone up, feel more confident about their body and their lives for the past 16 years. With a dual degree in Exercise Science and Psychology from Rutgers University along with 15+ personal training certifications ranging from National Academy of Sports Medicine to Pre and Post-Natal Training and Certified Strength and Conditioning Specialist, he can help you achieve your goals! His blog The Tao of John has all of his latest writings. Things you will learn in this episode: How mindset effects getting started Shame and guilt in change...