Hard Ticket To Hawaii

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Film Frown

TV & Film


Chris & Paul were incredibly lucky to be joined by Darren Herczeg & Adam Dachis from Supercharged & The Awkward Human Survival Guide shows on the 5by5 podcast network. The cinema flavor sampled on this episode was Hard Ticket to Hawaii, a titillating adventure featuring useless bullets, inconsistent bazooka blasts and bad actors that make the co-star centerfolds look like Glenn Close or Julianne Moore. As Darren would say, “Aloha!” Adam will be starring in a West Wing reboot? Adam is a co-author of The Awkward Human Survival Guide . Darren’s amazing short, Tennis. You’ll love it. (pun intended) Chris steals his intro styling from Gilbert Gottfried’s Amazing Colossal Podcast! Adam says Gilbert Gottfried Reads 50 Shades of Grey is the best Gilbert thing ever. Chris rather enjoys that Cards Against Humanity sponsored Gilbert’s show once and ask him to read the Bill Pullman speech from Independence Day in lieu of an advertisement. Listen around 1:45, here. Director of the film, Andy Sidaris was the father of the “honey shot” in sports broadcasting. Darren asks if Dona Speiris related to Albert Speer? That will really kill the mood in your masturbatorium. Is that a non-little person version of Hervé Villechaize as a henchman? Adam shares that Florida warns people to wear long socks to protect themselves from snakes. WHA? Surely that will work as well as the duck and cover during a nuclear attack. Oh, hey! Why not get some snake protection leggings instead of long socks? Joe Bob Briggs interviews Andy Sidaris. Another interview shows Dona Speir with her arm around Andy while his wife Arlene promotes the movie. Apparently this film is a sequel to Malibu Express. The company uniform for the girls’ cargo business? Darren points out that this movie has not one, but two theme songs. You can sample one, here. The confusion of white people playing races other than white? It happens with the film’s villain. Also, Darren says see Emma Stone in Aloha. Is that Glen A. Larson’s real-life yacht? Darren compares Sidaris to Mark Cuban, who you may recognize from Shark Tank. Harold Diamond went to the kickboxing school of acting. The master class. The delivery boy is played by Sidaris’ son, Christian. Darren tells us you can travel to Cambodia to blow up a cow with a bazooka. Who is a more convincing woman? Adam, Dustin Hoffman in Tootsie or the character in The Crying Game. Hawkeye vs. Green Arrow, the battle no one really cares about. Chris wants a sequel where the snake has 36 hours to live and it’s in the same vein as Crank. You think the podcast is long? Imagine how the guests feel. Darren decides to draw while he’s bored (NSFW). Darren wants to hire Dona Speir Berman for his next project. Here’s her FB, Darren. Does Taryn suffer from upspeak? “We need more female body builders in film.” Except Chyna, of course. Cut and suddenly the bad guy has a knife and Jake is wearing shuko hand claws? We don’t recommend you cheat yourself of the viewing pleasure of this art film, but Paul did mention there are GIFs available at giphy. Thanks to Darren & Adam for taking the time to join Paul & Chris on a show that ended up being longer than the movie reviewed. Please check out their shows, The Awkward Human Survival Guide and Supercharged. Of course, thank you for listening. If you’d like to support the show, please see our Patreon page. Support Film Frown on Patreon